Time management with children, the fine line between organization and education

The Professional Organizer who supports parents in the task of developing organizational skills within the family unit, is the professional who passes on strategies, methods and tools, knowing how strongly they support the upbringing and smooth running of the small "business-family."

And it is in this constructive and empathetic relationship that the P.O. is often faced with that fine line between organizing and educating-where do good organizational habits begin and where do those related to educating begin? Because the boundary is so impalpable, the Professional Organizer must intervene with great delicacy, honing his or her listening and communication skills in supporting parents and children in a change of habits.

From personal experience, I have repeatedly found that one of the key issues that creates the most difficulty is time management. We are all aware of what a precious and limited resource it is, but people often find themselves, despite themselves, caught up in hectic rhythms in which they do not give proper attention to organization, analyzing what aspects can be improved or transformed, and/or what habits can be changed with the clear goal of improving the quality of their lives. It is for many a hot topic that we tend to put off, instead of addressing it with the intention of regaining greater serenity while also positively facilitating interpersonal relationships.

In relationship with parents to help children

Turning to a Professional Organizer for practical support even in learning and passing on the value of time management can prove to be a crucial step in improving one's lifestyle and that of one's children.

Setting changes in motion while being aware of the need to do so can be exhausting, and turning to an organizational professional often proves decisive. It is in the relationship with the client, after careful listening and working alongside the client in the field, that the right practical solutions are identified, which must, however, be tested and verified together. I have witnessed how willingly children and young people accept a suggestion coming from a figure outside the family unit, resulting in an empathetic relationship that naturally translates into new practical practices.

As P.O., we suggest that attention be paid from an early age to the development of a constructive relationship with "time," in order to understand its value and cultivate the "right pace" in the growing years to come. Children need to be helped to develop a "perception of time" and then implement "organizational methods and strategies" that will make them feel able to "manage themselves in time" to the best of their ability.

But what are the most complex topics related to time management when it comes to children and teens?
- Study planning
- The ability to manage one's time to the best of one's ability, related to the various daily activities
- The management of devices, whether it is a cell phone or the Play station (which often becomes a ground for very heated confrontations)

What to do and what tools to use?

One does not become organized overnight, but by choosing a path made up of small steps, one achieves constructive results and satisfaction. Educating children and young people about organization involves an investment of energy, patience, support, and even a little discipline. Parents, are the first ones who must set themselves the goal of conveying the value of time management, having the confidence that their educational investment will yield valuable results.

In the case of adults, children and teens, visualizing time is an important key to being able to decide the pace of one's days. Work is done on several levels:

1. How much time is needed to do that given thing?
(a school assignment, a play activity?).
• For younger children, a cardboard clock can be created to show the movement of the hands and make visible li time passing by, making it with them, makes them participate and aware.
• For older children, we suggest the tomato technique, cadencing time consciously helps them work more focused and not get lost in distracting activities.https://organizzareitalia.com/2015/05/la-tecnica-del-pomodoro/
2. How much time is appropriate to devote to that activity? (e.g., proper use of devices or devoting time to tidying up one's room or cooperating in household chores)
• Create a timetable, indicating the activities to be carried out and how much time to devote to each of them. This tool clearly indicates the timelines agreed upon with the children/youth, which will be adhered to, avoiding unnecessary discussions.
• Use preprinted forms (ideal for studying) in which to mark what time you start and end an activity, what distractions and/or difficulties you encounter.
3. How does the day unfold? The week? The month? (How many and what activities can I fit into that time frame and with what deadlines?)
The calendar is a basic tool for setting and developing our gait. It is appropriate to incorporate this tool into daily life as soon as possible to understand its benefits. You can start with a family calendar illustrating the week, placing it in a place visible to all, by doing so, children and young people will be aware of the activities of all members of the household, developing mutual respect and working together as a team.
https://www.amazon.it/Calendario-Agenda-della-Famiglia-2024/dp/B0C1JCTFCL/ref=sr_1_6?keywords=calendario+famiglia&qid=1690044231&sr=8-6

The field experience

A mother contacted me as her 13-year-old son was spending too much time on devices, to the detriment of studying. The relationship had become highly confrontational dictated by strong misunderstandings and an inability to communicate in serenity. The mother felt a strong need to regulate the use of the Play station, facilitate communication with her son, and improve his time management with the aim of devoting more attention to study.

• The first phase of the intervention, was dedicated to listening, confrontation, I approached the relationship with the boy in a calm, direct and empathetic way, modulating myself in relation to his age and comparing how much time was being devoted to an activity that distracted him from important priorities such as studying also negatively affecting his degree of concentration. It was important to understand how much he first, was not fully aware of how much time he was spending in front of the video, his perception was not realistic.
• In the second phase, we devoted ourselves to creating together the "timetable," which is a practical tool that would be used to adhere to and monitor the timetable; we also combined it with the use of a timer. Having made this paper form, to be attached to the wall in a visible way allowed us to outline rules to be followed and greatly facilitated the relationship with parents.

Incorporating healthy habits and rules loosens tention and facilitates communication. A rule can be decided together, as it must be justified, but once chosen it must be respected. The parents first were happily surprised to see how their son, coped with the suggested changes achieving greater serenity of the whole household.

I remind you of our activities
(https://organizzareitalia.com/organizzazione-per-la-scuola-e-gli-insegnanti/)

The following is the link to the shadowing courses for parents, you may find the answers to your needs and entice you to start a path, in which I will be by your side.
https://organizzareitalia.com/courses/genitori-gestisci-il-tempo-in-famiglia-corso-individuale/

"The key is not to spend time, but to invest it."

Stephen R. Covey